The Church Of Hot Addiction
by Nate Fisher
Summary: MSN conversations with the Marauders. May be a little OOC.


**A/N: **Used with my good friends Dallas and Hunter. Actual conversations because we got bored.

Pring Prang Prongs = James (Me!)

Lily Evans = Lily. (Hunter!)

Sirius Fucking Black = Sirius. (Dallas!)

Teenage Werewolf = Remus (Me!)

Snape, Snape, Severus Snape = Snape (Me!)

I like food = Wormtail (Also me!)

Enjoy. :) Flame all you want.

* * *

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***Hey. You guys pumped for the Yule Ball?**

Lily Evans says:

*Yule Ball? I didn't even know we were having one... When is it?

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***Next week. Wanna come with me? :) I'll bring the Licorice Snaps!**

Sirius Fucking Black says:

***Really Prongs? Licorice Snaps? **

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***You know I love me some Licorice Snaps.**

Lily Evans says:

*Not a chance, Potter. I'd rather be escorted by the squid.

Sirius Fucking Black says:

***Sadly... I do **

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***The squid doesn't have a tux. Come on, Evans!**

Lily Evans says:

*No thank you. If it comes to it, I'll just stay in the common room all night. I'd rather do that than go with you.

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***You know you're dying to go with me. Right, Padfoot? **

Sirius Fucking Black says:

***Hmm? Oh yeah, Sure... Lily definitely wants to go with you **

Lily Evans says:

*You're both sadly mistaken, then.

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***... Fine, fine. If you don't want to go alone there's always Snivelly.**

Lily Evans says:

*I'd rather go with him than you any day, Potter.

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***He'll never have my sexiness. He's a slimy git and you know it.**

Lily Evans says:

*I refuse to sit here and listen to you call him demeaning names. If you're going to insult him, don't do it in front of me.

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***Technically I'm not in front of you. **

*

* Snape, Snape, Severus Snape. has been added to the conversation.

*

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***Speak of the devil. Hello, Snivelly!**

Lily Evans says:

*You know what I mean, Potter.

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***Not sure I do, Evans.**

Sirius Fucking Black says:

***Oh god. If hes here, Im just going to... Go **

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***Padfoot, stay.**

Lily Evans says:

*Hello Severus. Ignore those two.

Sirius Fucking Black says:

***Do I have to Prongs? **

Snape, Snape, Severus Snape. says:

*What do you want, Potter?

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***Yes indeed you do. Or else. **

**.. Not you, Snivelly. **

Snape, Snape, Severus Snape. says:

*Hello Evans.

Lily Evans says:

*Can you be polite to him for once in your life? Honestly...

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***I can. But I won't because that's no fun. I want Licorice Snaps.**

Snape, Snape, Severus Snape. says:

*It's okay, Evans. Potter's just a lowlife who's too busy with other people's lives that he doesn't pay any attention to his.

Lily Evans says:

*I have to partially agree with that.

Sirius Fucking Black says:

***Listen here Snivelly**

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***EXCUSE YOU.**

Sirius Fucking Black says:

***Dont start with James**

Snape, Snape, Severus Snape. says:

*Or what, Black?

Lily Evans says:

*Sev, don't start with them. They're all talk, anyway.

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***EXCUSE /YOU/.**

Sirius Fucking Black says:

***Or what? **

Snape, Snape, Severus Snape. says:

*Yes.

Sirius Fucking Black says:

***Do you really want to know or what? Hes going to kick your fucking ass**

Lily Evans says:

*Like I said, all talk.

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***... Damn straight.**

**But you like my words. **

Snape, Snape, Severus Snape. says:

*I'm trembeling.

Lily Evans says:

*Not when those words are shameless flirting and relentless pining.

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***Would I be James Nathaniel Potter if I didn't?**

**I LOVE THIS SONG. **

**Can you dance like a Hippogriff? Nanananananana!**

Snape, Snape, Severus Snape. says:

*You have terrible singing, Potter.

Sirius Fucking Black says:

***Really James...? **

Lily Evans says:

*Yes, and a much more tolerable James Nathaniel Potter at that.

Sirius Fucking Black says:

***Snape just stop fucking following Lily around. Go find some real friends **

Lily Evans says:

*You don't need to 'defend' me, Black.

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***Coming from YOU, Snivelly? You don't even know how to sing.**

**Really, Sirius. It's my favorite song. I love the Weird Sisters!!**

**Yeah, yeah, yeah.**

Sirius Fucking Black says:

***Dont take it personal Evans. This isnt for you**

***I just really cant stand that creep**

Snape, Snape, Severus Snape. says:

*... Stop snogging random fifth graders in broom closest, Black. Go find a real girlfriend.

Sirius Fucking Black says:

***Oh Fuck off Snivelly... Jealous? **

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***Coming from you? When have you ever had a girlfriend, Snivellous? That's what I thought. And no, Evans doesn't count because I doubt she enjoys spending time with YOU. **

Snape, Snape, Severus Snape. says:

*Yeah. It's so hard to shag a fifth year these days.

Lily Evans says:

*Shut your mouth, Potter. I do enjoy his company, much more than I enjoy yours, actually.

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***... Have you seen your hair?**

**Speaking of hair. I have some serious business to discuss about Dumbledore.**

Snape, Snape, Severus Snape. says:

*Thank you, Evans.

Lily Evans says:

*I really don't want to hear a story about your woes and how Dumbledore won't give you his stash of Licorice Snaps.

*You're welcome, Sev.

Sirius Fucking Black says:

***I havent seen you doing it Snivelly? Whats wrong? No one likes you? James is right. Maybe if you showered once in a while **

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***... Licorice Snaps are the shit. They're like an orgasm in your mouth.**

**But anyways....**

**I think Dumbledore was hitting on me.**

Snape, Snape, Severus Snape. says:

*I know plenty of people who like me, thank you very much, Black.

Lily Evans says:

*Don't be an idiot, Potter. I honestly doubt he was hitting on you. Are you sure you weren't having drunken dillusions?

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***YOU THINK THIS IS A JOKE? **

Sirius Fucking Black says:

***You keep telling yourself that Snivellous **

Snape, Snape, Severus Snape. says:

*It's true!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***No it's not.**

Sirius Fucking Black says:

***Suure **

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***... SO BACK TO MY DUMBLEDORE STORY. He was all. "Professor Slughorn needs to see you."And I was all. "Okay." And he's all. "By the way, Mr. Potter, can I see your cloak?"**

**I ran away :( **

Sirius Fucking Black says:

***Really James**

***I think Lily was right**

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***AND THEN HE STARTED WINKING AT ME.**

Sirius Fucking Black says:

***Are you sure you wernt drunk? **

Lily Evans says:

*...Idiot.

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***Next thing you'll know he'll be asking me to make him Bubbles and Squeak!**

Snape, Snape, Severus Snape. says:

*Potter, get over yourself.

Lily Evans says:

*Ugh, don't remind me of food. I'm starving.

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***... You can always eat me.**

Lily Evans says:

*Again, no thank you, Potter.

Sirius Fucking Black says:

***Oh god **

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***I see a thank you in there!**

Lily Evans says:

*Yes, with a 'no' before it.

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***Must be opposite day.**

Lily Evans says:

*In your dreams.

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***Sometimes dreams become reality.**

Snape, Snape, Severus Snape. says:

*This is disgusting.

*

* Snape, Snape, Severus Snape. has left the conversation.

*

Lily Evans says:

*Not this dream.

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***Whew! Thank God he's gone!**

Lily Evans says:

*Ugh, you can both be such gits.

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***A sexy git.**

Sirius Fucking Black says:

***Yeah, Im going to just... Go**

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***PADFOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT**

***DON'T LEAVE ME.**

Lily Evans says:

*...Right. Whatever you say, Potter. Keep thinking that.

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***Anywho.**

**I have a detention with Slughorn. I'll see you in my dreams, Evans!**

Sirius Fucking Black says:

***Prongs...**

***Are you by chance hung over? **

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***What a silly thing to say!**

***Of course not. **

Lily Evans says:

*Right. What's that detention for this time?

Pring Prang Prongs ! says:

***You'll have to kiss me to find out ;).**

**Bye!**

Lily Evans says:

*I don't want to know that badly.

* Pring Prang Prongs ! has left the conversation.


End file.
